Abraham Lincoln < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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(Frage) beantwortet  | | Datum: | 12:33 Sa 14.11.2009 | | Autor: | Marc_hb |
Hallo liebe Forumfreunde,
ich muss am Montag ein Referat halten und ich hab so einige Schwierigkeiten mit meirn Sprache worauf meine Lehrerin seh achtet und deswegen würde ich mich sehr freuen, wenn jmd nochmal ein Blick drauf werfen könnte, ob ich sprachliche Fehler gemacht habe.
Abraham Lincoln
Childhood and education
Abraham Lincoln was born on the 12th of February 1809, in a log cabin near Hodgenville, Kentucky. His parents, Thomas Lincoln and Nancy Hanks, were farmers, so that the young Abraham Lincoln had to work hard on the fields, what he didn’t like. There was also no time left for a substantiated education.
The family belonged to a Separate Baptists church, which had high moral standards frowning on alcohol consumption and dancing, and many church members were opposed to slavery. Abraham himself never joined their church, or any other church, and is the only president to have never done so.
When Lincoln was nine, his mother, then 34 years old, died of milk sickness. Soon afterwards, his father remarried to Sarah Bush Johnston who was a better mother for the children than for biological mother and who made sure that Abraham Lincoln educated himself. Lincoln and his stepmother were close; he called her "Mother" for the rest of his life. As Abraham grew up, he loved to read and preferred learning instead of working in the fields. This led to a difficult relationship with his father who was just the opposite.
In his Abraham Lincoln’s adolescence his family moved two times. In 1816 the Lincoln family left Kentucky to make a new start in Perry County and in 1830 the Lincolns moved west to Illinois.
Thomas Lincoln demanded from his son, that he earned money as a farm worker but Abraham Lincoln rebelled against his father and left the family.
The political career
Abraham Lincoln began a new life in New Salem where he worked in a shop. Furthermore he began his home studies in the field of political science. Because of his interest in politics, Lincoln stood as a candidate for the legislative assembly of the state Illinois and on the second try he was affiliated. With this goal in mind to be a lawyer the ambitious Abraham Lincoln began his second home studies in the field of jurisprudence and on March 1837 he was licensed as lawyer in Springfield. Abraham Lincoln was a very likeable, sympathetic and eloquence person so that he became a well- known lawyer. In the year 1839 Lincoln felt in love with one of the smartest and most beautiful women in the city who was called Mary Ann Todd. Although her parents did not agree with his unpretentious origin, Mary Ann Todd and Abraham Lincoln got married on the 4th of November 1842. Six years later he built his own house and was elected with a two- thirds majority to a congressman of the United States.
The dividing of the country
In Abraham Lincoln’s times the South of America was based on agriculture whereas in the North banks, enterprises and factories were built. Consequently the slavery was the way of life in the South while the North tried to abolish the slavery. Therefore America was a divided country.
Abraham Lincoln was a Northerner and detested the slavery everything associated with it.
In the year 1848 he ran for the re- election as a congressman of the United States but he did not poll enough votes, so that he was very disappointed and had to readopt the legal profession.
It was the foundation of the Republican Party which effected the change in Abraham Lincoln’s life. The Republican Party wanted the restriction of the slavery and the rescue of the Union. For that purpose the Republican Party needed leader, needed a good politician who was eloquent and able to convince a crowd of people. They needed Abraham Lincoln who was selected as the leader in the year 1856. And on the 6th of November 1860 he was elected into the office of the president of America. But this election declared the civil war, because the South states did not want to see a Republican in the White House. Abraham Lincoln wanted to save the Union and he was willing to achieve their goal with power. In the civil war the abolitionists advised him to forbid the slavery because they were afraid that England affronted the Union because England traded in the South. Abraham Lincoln had to make a momentous decision but he rejected this suggesting because he feared that the South attacked the North. Of course Abraham Lincoln wanted to abolish the slavery but the risk was too high.
In this difficult time Abraham Lincoln had also family problems because he had often arguments with his wife. Abraham Lincoln and Mary Ann Todd had three children, Robert who was grown up, Willie who was eleven years old and the eight years old son called Tad. Their children managed to save their marriage. On February 1809 Willie died of a serious illness. Therefore Mary Anne did not leave her room for three months.
In the year 1863 Abraham Lincoln signed a document for the abolition of slave work nevertheless the war did not end.
The reconstruction
The Union conquered one territory after another so that it was a matter of time until the Union won the civil war. In spite of this success it seemed as if Abraham Lincoln would lose his presidential chair because he wasn’t popular and the North longed for peace. As a result Abraham Lincoln had to decide if he made peace and allowed the slavery to win the presidential election or he continued the civil war. Lincoln took the risk and continued the civil war so that the Union conquered one of the biggest cities of the South: Atlanta. This conquest had effect on the presidential election. On the 8th of November 1864 reelected as the president of the United States. Six months later America was reunited and Abraham Lincoln had to reestablish the devastated land.
The assassination attempt
It happened on Good Friday, the 14th April 1865. Lincoln and his wife visited a theatre performance. During the people received him with standing ovations, Lincolns Bodyguard left him alone, what was grave error. Nobody paid attention to the man who crept up on Abraham and shot him dead. The crowd got into a panic and the assassin could escape but a few weeks later Lincoln’s murder was caught and executed in Washington.
But Abraham Lincoln reached his targets because he kept America from self- destruction and abolished the slavery.
Abraham Lincoln was the first, but not the last president of the United States who was assassinated.
Vielen Dank!
Mit freundlichen Grüßen, Marc
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Hallo,
Ich habe mal schnell drüber geschaut und Fehler behoben. Das Niveau des Texts ist gut, dennoch waren ein paar Fehler drin. Manchmal waren es nicht wirklich Fehler, sondern es gab eine bessere Art sich auszudrücken.
Ich habe die Fehler nummeriert, damit du siehst wo die Fehler waren. Unten gibt es ein paar Erklärungen dazu.
MfG Hannelore
Abraham Lincoln
Childhood and education
Abraham Lincoln was born on the 12th of February 1809 in a log cabin near Hodgenville, Kentucky as a son of Thomas Lincoln and Nancy Hanks. During his childhood, much to his dislike, he worked hard on the family’s farm leaving him no time for a substantiated education. (1)
The family belonged to a Separate Baptists church, which had high moral standards frowning on alcohol consumption and dancing, and many church members were opposed to slavery. Abraham himself never joined their church, or any other church, and is the only president to have never done so.
When Lincoln was nine, his mother, then 34 years old, died of milk sickness. Soon afterwards, his father remarried to Sarah Bush Johnston who was a better mother for the children than their biological mother and who made sure that Abraham Lincoln would keep an interest for education(2). Lincoln and his stepmother were close; he called her "Mother" for the rest of his life. As Abraham grew up, he loved to read and preferred learning instead of working in the fields. This led to a difficult relationship with his father who was just the opposite.
In his (2b) adolescence his family moved two times. In 1816 the Lincoln family left Kentucky to make a new start in Perry County and in 1830 the Lincolns moved west to Illinois.
Thomas Lincoln demanded from his son, that he earned money as a farm worker but Abraham Lincoln rebelled against his father and left the family.
The political career
Abraham Lincoln began a new life in New Salem where he worked in a shop. Furthermore he began his home studies in the field of political science. Because of his interest in politics, Lincoln stood as a candidate for the legislative assembly of the state of(3) Illinois and on his(4) second attempt he was affiliated. With the goal in mind to become a lawyer,(5) the ambitious Abraham Lincoln began his second home studies in the field of jurisprudence and on March 1837 he was licensed as (6) a lawyer in Springfield. Abraham Lincoln became a well known layer thanks in part for him being a very likeable, sympathetic and eloquent person(7). In the year 1839 Lincoln fell (8) in love with one of the smartest and most beautiful women(9) in the city who was called Mary Ann Todd. Although her parents did not liked him due(10) to his unpretentious origin, Mary Ann Todd and Abraham Lincoln got married on the 4th of November 1842. Six years later he built his own house and was elected with a two- thirds majority as (11) a congressman of the United States.
The dividing of the country
In Abraham Lincoln’s time(12) America was divided due to ideological and economy based differences. The south of America had an economy(13) based on agriculture whereas in the North banks, enterprises and factories were the main source of wealth(14). Consequently the slavery was the way of life in the South while the North tried to abolish it.
Abraham Lincoln was a Northerner and detested the slavery and everything associated with it.
In the year 1848 he ran for the re- election as a congressman of the United States but he did not pull(15) enough votes, so that he had to readopt the legal profession.
It was the foundation of the Republican Party which effected the change in Abraham Lincoln’s life. The Republican Party wanted the restriction of the slavery and the rescue of the Union. For that purpose the Republican Party needed a leader, (16) a good politician who was eloquent and able to convince a crowd of people. They needed Abraham Lincoln who was selected as the Republican Party’s leader in the year 1856. And on the 6th of November 1860 was sworn as President of the United States of America(17). But this election helped ignite(18) the civil war, because the South states did not want to see a Republican in the White House. Abraham Lincoln wanted to save the country(19) and was willing to achieve their goal with force(20). (((In the civil war the abolitionists advised him to forbid the slavery because they were afraid, that England affronted the Union because England traded in the South. Abraham Lincoln had to make a momentous decision but he rejected this suggesting because he feared that the South attacked the North.)))(21) Of course Abraham Lincoln wanted to abolish the slavery but the risk was too high.
In this difficult time Abraham Lincoln had also family problems due to (22)arguments with his wife. Abraham Lincoln and Mary Ann Todd had three children, Robert who was grown up, Willie who was eleven years old and the eight years old son called Tad. Their children managed to save their marriage. On February 1809 Willie died of a serious illness. Therefore Mary Anne did not leave her room for three months.
In the year 1863 Abraham Lincoln signed a document for the abolition of slavery.(23)
The reconstruction
The Union conquered one territory after another so that it was a matter of time until the Union would win the civil war. Despite(24) of this success it seemed as if Abraham Lincoln would lose his presidential chair because he wasn’t popular and the North longed for peace. As a result Abraham Lincoln had to decide whether(25) to make peace and allow slavery(26), to remain president of the United States, or to continue the civil war. Lincoln took the risk and continued the civil war. The Union conquered one of the biggest cities of the South: Atlanta. This conquest had effect on the presidential election. On the 8th of November 1864 Lincoln was reelected(27) as the president of the United States. Six months later America was reunited and Abraham Lincoln had to reestablish the devastated land.
The assassination attempt
It happened on Good Friday, the 14th April 1865. Lincoln and his wife visited a theatre performance where the people received him with standing ovations. Lincoln’s Bodyguard left him alone, what was a grave error. Nobody paid attention to the man who crept up on Abraham and shot him dead. The crowd got into a panic and the assassin could escape but a few weeks later Lincoln’s murder was caught and executed in Washington. (28)Abraham Lincoln reached his targets because he kept America from falling apart(29) and abolished slavery. Abraham Lincoln was the first, but not the last president of the United States who was assassinated.
(21) Diese Sätze sind nicht sehr verständlich. Ich habe nicht wirklich verstanden was du meintest, denn die Sätze widersprechen sie sich manchmal.
(25) “If” bedeutet “falls”….. “whether”bedeutet “ob” und ist hier eher das richtige.
(29) "Self destructing" ist nicht sehr passend hier. Man versteht was gemeint ist, aber es hört sich mehr wie ein Raumschiff der Zerstört wird…… “falling apart” wäre hier besser.
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